Wednesday, February 16, 2011

'Glee'-Cap: Lauren Zizes Wouldn't Call It A 'Comeback'

Sam got his Bieber on, but the wrestler-turned-diva saved the episode.
By Jim Cantiello

Matthew Morrison, Jane Lynch and Jayma Mays in "Glee"
Photo: FOX

As the love triangle/quadrangle/pentagram plot continued on this week's "Glee," it was up to Justin Bieber and Lauren Zizes to lighten the mood. Anyway, while we bide our time until the return of Blaine and Kurt, it's time for a little Aural Intensity of our own. Sing along!

Sue fakes suicidal so that she gets what she wants:
A spot in the glee club allows her to taunt.
She pits diva against diva, they sing a song for lesbians,
But we found out what makes Sue break down and it's cancer patients
Singing out of tune.

Oh, oh, I'm scratching my head.
Don't know what's on my TV set.
Oh, oh thank God for
Lauren Zizes savin' this whole ep.

She knows what boys like ...

Sam thinks Justin's got some swag, so he imitates the Biebs,
A blond Bieber experience, with bonus puberty.
The girls all melt and the boys want in, so now add three.
Finn's all, "Hell no! Songs for 12 year-olds are not for me!"
(Nor for Grammy voters.)

Oh, oh, Quinn rejects him.
Oh, oh, Finn leads Rachel on.
Oh, they're switching partners
More than the Situation.

Better get some STD tests up in McKinley High.

Santana as a mistress,
Brittany as a fashion icon,
Things get so damn dreadful when Kurt and Blaine are gone.
But next week looks so epic, spin the bottle will be fun.
Until then I'm out of rhymes, so this "Glee"-cap is done!

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